Tuesday, 24 March 2015
Sunday, 22 March 2015
Monday, 16 March 2015
Tuesday, 10 March 2015
Friday, 6 March 2015
I wish I could go back in time. I had some wonderful college friends and we were a livid group of girls (yep … it was an all-girls gang). We had a lot of fun and we were a very closely knit group with no fall-outs during the several years in college.
We started out as 5 and we are still 5 who have remained in touch through all these years.
I look up to each one of them as individuals who have guided my life and made me into what I am today. They have molded my thinking and shaped my thoughts over the years.
I would have been a very different person if not for them. I would probably have ended up being an introvert and a person devoid of the zing in life. I would have submitted to the vagaries of life and become a docile person who would take life as it is without challenging it ever.
My friends taught me about life. How we live our life in the way we want. We make the choices and we are responsible. It is weak to blame the circumstances because even in the worst of circumstances, we have the choice. And the circumstances are in a lot of cases, a result of our earlier actions and decisions.
My brother has been the rock and anchor in my life. My friends (the gang of girls) have been the waves which shaped my life. They gave me a fresh new outlook to life. They helped me form my own thoughts and draw conclusions from them. They taught me how to take decisions and be responsible for them.
I cherish all the fun times we had in college.
I cherish the endless discussions on varied topics we had.
I cherish the occasional fights and differences we had.
I cherish all the coming together after the fights and quarrels and laughing at ourselves.
I cherish all the 'girl-talk' we would have and all the ogling we would do.
I cherish all the super-fun moments and pranks we played.
And I miss them all.
Life happened to us. We went our own ways. Some worked, other waited to get married. At this stage, all 5 of us are married and have children of different ages.
We remained in touch over phone and meeting each other rarely over the years. We somehow could never arrange to have all 5 of us in the same place at the same time in the past 10 years. Email was not something we connected over while in college so it somehow never became a communication channel for us. Then came whatsapp and we connected again. And now we could all share our lives on that small screen. Sharing our pictures, our moments of joy and pain. We have begun to share our life again … as we did in college.
Looking up from the mobile screen where one of my friends shared an old photo of ours I wish we could all go back in time and take admission in a college with a hostel and spend more time together.
Just today someone was talking about moving into another house and when asked how did they find it, the response was Housing.com … https://housing.com/lookup
Everyone needs an anchor in life … to keep you steady. Life is full of ups and downs and then there are times when you are completely shaken (so life is sideways too). Early on, you give too much importance to the random ups and downs and then something called 'maturity' and 'growing up' happens to you. And you begin to take things in your stride. But life is not out of its tools and it gives you some rocking experiences that shake you up.
Irrespective of the stage in life and whether you are mildly affected or completely shaken, you need someone who will help you through. They are your anchor. They are the ones who show you the right path, who shine the light (and often are the light themselves) when the world 'seems' to be dark all around you. They are the ones who truly care about you and are ready to hold your hand when you feel lost.
For me, it has been my elder brother who has been the 'rock' and 'anchor' of my life. He is like … Always there for me. Calm and serene - as if there is no problem in his life and he is ready to solve all of yours. In the toughest of times, he was the personification of calm and peace. It was often irritating for others to watch him calm while everybody is tensed and worried.
I always thought he never had problems (I was a child then). Only after 'growing up', I realized that it wasn't that he did not have the multitudes of problems of his own; the secret was in his way of handling and treating them. He had his own problems to tackle but he would be ready to advice you on yours. Also, what I learnt from him about handling problems was his clear objectivity in handling them.
His Golden Rule for problems: If there is a problem and it can be solved, then stop worrying and start working on the solution. No need to worry. If there is a problem and it cannot be solved, then stop worrying. If it cannot be solved, then ask for help and if it cannot be solved even by others, then stop thinking about it completely. No amount of worrying will solve the problem. Learn to accept it and live with it. SIMPLE. In summary – there is no need to worry in either case.
He has always given the right advise to me … encouraging me to 'look up' from the situation of calamity and rise above the problems. He used to say that to solve a problem, you got to lift your level. You cannot solve a problem at the same level of intellect at which they were created. Profound words indeed.
Just few days ago, a mutual friend was tensed about finding a rented accommodation and when he talked to my brother, he seemed surprised. He said that in this age of technology how can you worry about something trivial as that. Just look up. Our friend asked 'where?' and my brother again said 'Just Look Up' and this time he had mischief in his eyes.
He then told our friend about Housing.com and https://housing.com/lookup
Wednesday, 4 March 2015
A loving husband who becomes the center of your life but has to travel time and again because of his job is a strange kind of punishment. You long to be with him and he has shipped off to different places every now and then.
The few days that we would spend together became the essence of my life. Those days were the ones I really lived. The rest of the days, all I did was survive.
The first few moments after his arrival from business trips when he would give me a hug and hold me in his arms … pure utter bliss. Those moments of looking up to his face and seeing his stubble and the deep eyes which had nothing but love and care for me … I can never get over those moments.
Life begins to look up at those times and during the time he is around … and looks down when is away 'saat samundar paar'
And then came the angel. Our daughter was born and that changed everything. She became the center of my world and she occupied all my time. I did not have time for hubby dear and gone were those moments of post-arrival-hugs. Life changes when a baby arrives and the same happened to me.
And then he decided to quit his travelling job and take up something stable. I was happy to hear that but then he dropped the bomb. The job was in a different city and I would be joining him there after a couple fo months after he set-up things there and had taken a good flat in a good locality for rent to call it a home for foreseeable future.
And then it hit me … that he was going to be away for a couple of months.
Packing for him began and the day of his departure arrived. He was all set to leave and came to our room for a final good-bye.
He played with our daughter for a few months and then hugged her. And that's when he turned his face and I saw a tear escape his eyes. Our eyes met and he just opened his arms for me and took me also in a tight embrace. Those 2 minutes and the look on his face … I will never forget.
That one look rekindled in me the old flame. I was determined then and there, that when I travel to the other city and begin a new life with my hubby; I will give my old love life a fresh kick start. I looked up into his eyes and told him what I was thinking. He smiles, kissed me passionately and left …
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And now I am also working in parallel to find a good home in the new city. Housing.com would be a useful tool so checking out https://housing.com/lookup